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Wednesday, March 29, 2006

well....................
sometimes nothing can be a real cool hand.
-Luke, after the fight in Cool Hand Luke

i first started this thing during my travels. posted a few pics. shared a few laughs.

a decent number of people seems to enjoy it early on. but my life now is comprised of GINI coefficients, poverty headcount ratios, regressions, causality, conditionality, t-stats, and mastering STATA.

stories of vice or excess dont happen anymore. and its hard to write about the other stuff.

im finishin up here in the ITH soon.

people always talk about the future with such cautious hope. it doesnt matter how old someone is. a 5 year old boy will say how one day hell be great at tennis. a retired man will talk about travels. i think through the ups and downs hope above anything is what keeps a person in any situation going.

when shit was down for me, hope was all i had. i remember hearing a lady recall a brutal past. brutal in every way. childhood, less-then-nothing husband... everything. and her hope about the future was cautious, but it was there nonetheless. despite all she went through she still talked as if things might have a chance of changing.

i remember speaking to an old man on a train in India. he talked life after independence and politics and the lot. but he said the future of India was bright, the future in me was bright. make no mistake this man was a poor man. no development indicator needed to tell me that. yet he still talked with the passion for his country and his people as if he was 13 years old. the man might not have been educated, but he knew what was good and what was bad for his people. he thought things were looking up for the first time in his life and it continue. he hoped i would do well. i hope hes doing OK. and i hope hes right about everything.

sometimes i hope that ill achieve some extraorindary things. i look at advantages ive been blessed with and hope i can utilize them in some way. its what keeps me reading and learning and closing out the library every night. that hope. i hope that i dont mess up any chances that come my way.

i also hope that a little six year old boy with an infectious smile 'makes it' when all the statistics point against it. i hope despite all of that hell grow up to be a strong-minded intelligent man. i hope your ready for Chaudhuri 2.0, cause hes gonna be one mean SOB.

but if none of that happens, i hope God gives me the strength to keep going.

take care everyone, its been real.

j.

Tuesday, February 14, 2006

They say people in your life are seasons,
And anything that happen is for a reason,
And niggas guns a clappin and keep to squeezin',
And Gran (Grandma) keep prayin' and keep believin',
And Jesus and one day that ya see him,
Till they walk in his footsteps and try to be him,
The devil is alive I feel him breathin',
Claimin' money is the key so keep on dreamin',
And put them lottery tickets just to tease us,
My aunt Pam can't put those cigarettes down,
Now my lil cousin smokin those cigarettes now,
His job trying to claim that he too niggerish now,
Is it cuz his skin blacker than licorice now?
I can't figure it out...
Im Stickin around....

-kanye, heard em say

is growing a beard that controversial? a motherfucker cant grow a beard and have his hair long without people commenting on it and shit? mind your own fuckin business. thats what i say. let me live, baby, let me live.

The Boondocks is the best show on TV since Chappelle. if you like hip-hop, racial humor, and have a hlaf hour to spare, dont miss it. any show that has anime kung-fu with Madvillian playin in the back gets my thumbs up anyday.

my spanish is better then i thought.

motherfuckers gotta start eating healthy. get on that Telapia, youknowwhatimsayin?

the knicks are a disaster. what has isiah done? is it me or do we have two of the same player at every position?

cutting through semantics. the Vice President, shot someone in the face with a shotgun.

Wednesday, January 11, 2006

"I'm looking forward to a 15-year career, a couple of trips to the Super Bowl and a parade through downtown San Diego.''
-Ryan Leaf after 1998 NFL Draft

FOOTBALL BABY!! two great games, im offically rootin for Carolina and Steve Smith (the Allen Iverson of WRs).

im not one for Resolutions but here are some things id like to do by the end of the year, as i sit back in the ITH.
1-get a job
2- get 'good' at playing chess
3- read at least one Thomas Pynchon novel- i never seem to have done that
4- read all 7 volumes of Proust's In Search of a Lost Time (ill do this after school is over)
5- visit another country
6- wear a class ring and say to someone in a bar, 'oh this little thing, why its nothing'


=============================================================
Top Ten Things Buffalo Bills Coach Marv Levy Said At Halftime
=============================================================

10. "We won! Wooo! We're Super Bowl champs!"
9. "Boy, I'm sleepy. You guys sleepy?"
8. "We've got a long trip home after the game, so I don't want anyone wearing
themselves out"
7. "Now get out there and rest on your laurels!"
6. "Hey, Kelly. Leave some champagne for everyone else!"
5. "What do you mean there's two more quarters?"
4. "Let's plan exactly how you're gonna dump the Gatorade on me"
3. "Okay, boys -- get out there and start sucking!"
2. "Wait a minute, if we win, we have to go to Disneyland"
1. "Hey fellas, more fudge?"


Saturday, January 07, 2006

Choices over identities do involve constraints and connections, but the choices that exist and have to be made are real, not illusory. In particular, the chouce of priorities of different identities, including what relative weights to attach to their respective demands, cannot only be a matter of discovery. They are inescapably decisonal, and demand reason- not just recognition.
Amartya Sen- The Argumentative Indian pp352. (his new book its about India, no economics).

so my boy AO Scott at the Times had tha audacity to say Match Point was his best movie since 'Crimes and Misdimeanors'. he was right.

its still weird seeing a Woody Allen movie without Diance Keaton or Mia Farrow, or even himself. hes such an auteur with distinctive style its weird without the familiar characters soemtimes. but its something we gotta get used to. anyways the movie is very, very good. more darker and serious and some of the metaphors are quite obvious (like someone reading Crime and Punishment), but its one of the best movies ive seen in the last year.

speaking of i also revisited La Strada yesterday. i didnt really understand or finish it when i saw it at 19 or 20. but im going to place it above all other Fellini movies except 8 1/2. yes its better then La Dolce Vida. if there was a character that better symbolized Zampano's inability to empathize for others, i would play it. the final scene has haunted me since. is the possiblity of human emotion to only come after loss or absence of love or compassion? the Zampano character is all to familiar in modern cinema as well as real life. Scorcese said LaMotta in Tagin Bull was based off Zampano. the simliarity is obvious.
La Strada might be the saddest and most poetic movie you will ever see. (with the assumption you 'get it').

on a side note. a great article on DuChamp's famous piece (yes the urinal).

New York City is a horrible place. i grew up here and i cant stand it anymore. evil things happen here that dont happen anywhere else. a young Bengali women looked out her window to see what the sounds were outside. some idiots were shooting guns in the air and a bullet went through her window and killed her. can someone tell me what is the use of living in a place like this?
after living in the big ITH for so long, ive grown accostomed to rural life. you get to have your thoughts to yourself. you can walk down the street and actually have some peace of mind. traveling in India i realized that in the Himalayas, in the serenity, in the quiet, there is mental peace. i would just sit and look and stare for hours and hours. the immediate calming effect on the soul is undeniable. NYC is a cesspool, rats in a barrel. i cant wait to get back to the quiet.

Sunday, December 11, 2005

BACK TO THE FUTURE WAS TWNETY YEARS AGO.

Back to the Future was on TV recently. then i starting thinking how long ago it was. then i realized they went ot the future to 2015, TEN YEARS from now.

the movie came out in 1985. i saw The Great Escape a few years after that. i remember my dad saying how he didnt remember much of the movie, since he saw it so long ago in India. It was 20 years from when my dad saw The Great Escape to when i saw it. Just like how i saw Back to the Future in 1985 and then watching it now. Is ANY one else as freaked out about this as i am? i mean TWENTY YEARS!!! what the hell happened?

some kid was born a year after that movie. and now that kid will soon (like real soon) be of legal drinking age!!

i remember going to go see the sequel on a class trip. it was during winter break in 89. like the last day of school before the winter break. i was TEN years old. i was FUCKIN TEN YEARS OLD!! it has now been SIXTEEN YEARS FROM THAT DATE EXACTLY!!!

does this mean that ill be talking about Cool Hand Luke as being 50 years ago soon enough?

im seriously breakin down from all of this.

Friday, December 09, 2005

ive been examined since i was semen,
they took a sonogram and seen the image of a demon
- gravediggaz- 6 feet deep

MY DAY OFF

after 3 days of papers, exams and the stress life. i took a day off. at the end of the day i reflect exactly how i spent my free time.

- i get waaayyy too excited when "Cheap Seats" on ESPN Classic comes on. its funny, but its evident that i dont have a life when i get that happy.
- when did i develop a intense feel for Fiona Apple?
- KFC and MGD make a good combo. however while i was enjoying the refreshing taste of a cold beer i got one of those camera moments. you know you look at yourself like someone was filming you. what is an ivy league grad student doing drinking MGD, eating KFC, watching the Knicks, and wondering if my my throat was hurting because i smoke too much or that i was getting a cold. i need to start taking better care of myself
- its a little weird how much i enjoy strokin my new long hair
- i reflected on my econometrics project. looking at the endogenous variables of child mortality and primary education enrollment respectfully. then it hit me that wanting to examine child mortality is kind of sick.
- is it truly wrong to truly HATE hippies? i dont think i cant even try to be nice to them anymore, there just everywhere
- i miss the old eminem
- when did people stop drinking beer? why is wine or mald wine or whatever other things classy people drink accpetable? i think if people have people over, they HAVE to have some sort of beer. and its not fair that they call you ghetto.
- is it possible that youve seen too much porn over the course of one's life?
- Eric Crouch was on ESPN, and it brought me back to an old time. the play against Oklahoma is the best clutch play ive ever seen in college.
- Having a friend say 'your diatribes against the planners in class are the highlight of my two years here' just brought a smile to my face. its nice to know that my passion for a topic and hatin on 'rich white ostentatious pu$$ies' hasnt died.
- breaking my cell phone was so goddamn cathardic. if you wanna instantly feel better, just slam it on the ground and watch it shatter. then do it over again.... and over again.

Tuesday, November 22, 2005

Dry your eyes, baby-
Its out of character
-Cary Grant to Ingrid Berman in Notorious (a Hitchcock movie, and a damn good one at that)

ONE THING that im mad about. and another reason caucasions bother me.



Ted Koppel. tonight is his last show on Nightline. My parents used to watch it when i was little. as i got older i realized how great a show it was, and how much of that Ted Koppel was responsible for that. The big anchors reported the daily news and such, but Nightline went above that. Mr Koppel was always the contrarian, ever towing a specific line or special interest. I remember one week, years ago, he went to Zambia and highlighted the lack of infrastructure and how its affected local people. Another show he talked about AIDS in Africa but he never approached it liek everyone else with somber music and slow motion shots. It was honest and real. Im sure these were never ratings busters. The issues he presented you could tell were being told because he picked them, but he never put his opinion on them. In an time where cable news is over the top with opinions and 'fair and balanced', here is what in a Times article, he told someone on CNN about the nature of calbe news and their - "obsession with being first with the obvious." Now all I have left is Charlie Rose.

In any case, maybe not too many people care about the things shows like Nightline say. Too many are concerned with watching shows that cover the hot story or just preach to their audience. I can say for sure there are so many things that Nightline approached with intelligence, tact and most of all it was informative. So thanks Mr Koppel, thanks for showing me new things, and doing it all the right way. Youll be missed.

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